HELPING YOUR CHILD WHO'S BEEN WATCHING PORNOGRAPHY
If you've caught your son or daughter watching pornography, the first two things you need to know is that your child is not the worst child ever and you are not the worst parent ever. Many guys (boys and men) and many ladies (girls and women) struggle with some sort of lust or pornography. With this said, lust is a sin and pornography can be very damaging. So if you catch your child, or if they come to you first, follow these steps:
1. Don't Overreact- If you do, they won't want to communicate with you about it again.
2. Talk About It Often- Communication is healthy and accountability is important.
3. Set Strict Rules & Boundaries- Don't allow a computer in their room, keep phones out of the bedroom at nighttime, monitor usage, password protect computers & video game consoles, don't let them watch sexually explicit TV shows or movies, etc
4. Check In On Them- Check browsing history on Internet, Instagram, Facebook, etc. If all the browsing history is erased, this might be a sign they've been viewing sexually explicit material. Also, remember to talk (see step 2)!
5. Get A Monitoring Program- This is a very important step! Check out these programs and get one ASAP: X3Watch or Covenant Eyes.
6. Counseling- When we say counseling, we don't necessarily mean professional help. But talking through struggles with a pastor, director, or small group leader will help with accountability and help your child stop sinning.
Also, without question, you should always be praying for the spiritual formation of your child. If you ever need more advice and guidance, don't be afraid to reach out to our staff. We are always praying for your children!
CURRENT STATS/FACTS ABOUT PORNOGRAPHY IN OUR WORLD
All stats come from the video below
Over $3,000 is spent on porn every second on the internet
At least 30% of all data transferred across the internet is porn-related
There was an average increase of 24% of traffic during the global quarantine periods amidst the coronavirus outbreak
More than 50% of people engaging in online pornographic interactions admitted to losing interest in sexual intercourse
Porn sites receive more regular traffic than Netflix, Amazon and Twitter combined each month
90% of teens and 96% of young adults are either encouraging, accepting or neutral when they talk about porn with their friends
64% of young people actively seek out pornography weekly or more often (all hide from parents)
51% of male students and 32% of female students first viewed porn before their teenage years
The first exposure to porn among men is 12 years old, on average
Within the church: 64% of Christian men and a high percentage of Christian women say they watch porn at least once per month
Overall favorite time for viewing pornography is 11pm on Sunday nights
One of the top porn sites ranks as one of the top 10 sites on all of the internet (42 billion visits a year)
Pornography is a $12 billion industry with an estimated 370 million pornographic sites on the internet
The point? Your child has, or will be, exposed to pornography some way (maybe not intentional). It is so important to have open communication with our kids. It is important to talk about it now before they become adults.
GREAT SERMON TO WATCH TO LEARN THE SEVERITY OF LUST BUT TO REMEMBER JESUS DIED FOR THIS SIN
Village Church is located in Canada. Pastor Mark is a good friend of Larry Osborne and Chris Brown. This sermon will talk about the dangers of lust, the commonality among people, the science behind it, the love Jesus still has for us and the importance to address it in our lives.
THE GREAT LIE: WATCHING PORNOGRAPHY DOESN’T HURT ANYBODY.
IT’S SOMETHING I DO PRIVATELY.
Debunking the lie:
Watching pornography hurts your relationship with God. How? It is sinful and is not God’s intention for sexuality.
Watching pornography hurts your relationship with others. How? You distance yourself from others for more and more consumption. Also, shame often times causes us to hide.
Watching pornography hurts your relationship with yourself. How? It changes your brain, negatively affects your dopamine reward system, leads to depression.
Watching pornography hurts your future sex life. How? Sex is good, in the context of marriage. Pornography lies to you about what sex is like. Also, many addicted people would rather watch porn than have sex with their spouse (which is commanded of believers).
Watching pornography hurts the world. How? There are many connections between pornography and sex trafficking, rape, child pornography and violence.
Pornography is very dangerous. That is why we need to “fight the new drug”.
Click here to read a great resource from fightthenewdrug.org to read more about the dangers of pornography.
ARTICLES FOR TEEN GIRLS OR PARENTS OF TEEN GIRLS WHO ARE STRUGGLING WITH PORNOGRAPHY
“To the Christian Girl Who Watches Porn”